It takes me forever to learn something & then when i actually get it the feeling is indescribable. In that moment i feel like i am capable of anything. You know those feelings like, "nothing can stop you" & all you want to do is to get up on that board and surf the wake. Well, that was it for me.It took me try after try after try. Our minds are so powerful. Every time i fell, i would always get upset with myself & compare myself to my brothers "why is it me that sucks", "i am such a loser compared to them," throwing myself a pity party. This took me 3 days of boating. On our last day of boating, i contemplated about getting back on the surf on the last day. I didn't want to keep falling & I was letting my ignorance get in the way. Saying mean things to myself "I am never going to get up with out the rope," "whats the point it is our last day here out on the water," "i probably wont go boating until next season," "My husbands not even here to cheer me on,""the water is freezing, I am warm".
Now i am going to stop right there. BECAUSE, when my mom asked me if i wanted to surf i said; "no". Then, after watching Jamie go & seeing her do it with no problem kind of made me a little jealous of her. Then it clicked, i got my big girl panties on & hustled. To say the least she encouraged me to get back out there. I changed my mind set & told myself i am being ridiculous get your ass in the water, you grew up with four brothers & a boat. Prove to yourself you are just as good if not better.
Then when i got back out on the board. I listened carefully to my coaches (Zeke, Conner) shouting at me from the boat. Shouting so i can hear what they are saying, working on getting the perfect wave & watching. In the midst of things, me, watching Tayson from the boat while my mom was holding him thinking to myself I am going to ride this surf with out the rope, I know i can do this, i will not fail in front of my boy & sure enough i got up.I love this story for my blog because i want you to know that i always tend to look at everyone else, yes i admit i have a lot of comparisons, & hope that i can be just as brave & just as perfect. .
Here is the thing we don't tell ourselves. Maybe it took them ten billion times to fall, maybe it didn't. We all have different Talents & we all are better at one thing or another. But if we try then we can practice & learn to love new hobbies or talents in life & we can explore a little more. In the whole scheme of things, be kind to yourself. You deserve a positive mind to keep you moving forward, to keep going at life. You deserve a Happy Life. So whenever you come upon something new, do me a favor & always say kind words while you are trying.
